good morning bbr, (bigmoose blog reader)
this week i did a podcast with chloe, for charlie reading and claire fudge at “the business of endurance” which is self explanatory in its design, and it seemed to go well, with chloe and i dovetailing quite nicely, and i can see our career as a double act growing, so if any readers need a dad/daughter duo to do any speaking events, just reach out.
the reason for mentioning the podcast, apart from trying to solicit more speaking engagements for batman and robin, was to talk about how podcasts are a fun way to reminisce, as the interviewer will of course reference prior experiences, which is always a fun experience, as long as you don’t tend to focus on too much trauma i guess.
but my experiences of interviewers is they don’t tend to push too hard, or maybe i’m too thick skinned to recognise it, and as i write this i realise the interviewer did ask about my parkinson’s, which i suppose could have triggered me, but didn’t, probably due to the fact that talking about it doesn’t phase me, yet, who knows what the future holds, but for now i’ll freely talk about it, and try not to let it impact my life or my decision making process too much.
anyway, back to reminiscing.
as i wrote ‘back to reminiscing’ i consciously thought that was the opposite of an oxymoron, but didn’t know what that was called, but turns out it’s a pleonasm, who knew?
on the podcast we reminisced about the beginning of bigmoose, kilimanjaro, everest 1 and 2.0, and a sack full of other memories, and it reminded me of bruce springsteen’s lyrics to his song ‘glory days’.
glory days
they’ll pass you by, glory days
in the wink of a young girl’s eye, glory days
glory days
think i’m going down to the well tonight
and i’m going to drink ’till i get my fill
and i hope when i get old, i don’t sit around thinking about it
but i probably will
yeah just sitting back trying to recapture a little of
well, the time slips away
leaves you with nothing, mister, but boring stories of
glory days.
well bruce, i think the only way for me is to keep writing new stories, and having new adventures, which segues nicely into a story about curt, our first ever homeless young man bigmoose helped by employing him at the coffee shop.
i’ve written about curt before, but when he was first signposted to us he had spent some years living in shelters, since he was 18, with nobody really believing in him, so i felt we had to win his trust.
he and i travelled to bristol, and completed a barista skills course, and curt became a fantastic barista, though still carrying some anger and trauma.
we recognised this, and decided to see if he would be willing to speak to a counsellor to try to help him.
he agreed.
so for a number of weeks i would drive him to cyncoed, and wait for him outside the counsellor’s office, then drive him back to town, and i could see a change in his personality, and he and i were becoming closer, with our shared love of music bonding us.
i went and watched him rehearse with his band in caerphilly, and tania and i went to watch him gig in a dark, sticky carpets venue in whitchurch, and i could see his confidence growing massively.
i spoke to him about my love of mountains, and we both went to climb pen y fan, and i could see he loved the outdoors and this new world he was being exposed to.
he worked hard, and bonded with customers and staff really well, until one day we were alone together in our office upstairs chatting about nothing in particular, when i looked over, and saw him with tears in his eyes, trying to wipe them away.
i was confused, i thought he was happy, so asked what was wrong.
and he replied that this was the first time in his life that he didn’t want to kill himself.
we hugged, and didn’t let go for a long while, he gives great hugs.
he then, like in a bruce springsteen song, met a girl.
they moved to her home country of germany, where he is thriving, and a little while ago he came back and played a fundraising gig for bigmoose at the coffee shop, where he proudly told me he had read springsteen’s autobiography, and had started listening to his music, my brainwashing had worked.
fast forward to this year, and he has invited me to meet up in prague to go and see bruce together, and has bought me my ticket, how beautiful is that, i’m going to be an emotional wreck?
he is very much like an adopted son, and i am so grateful for the human connections bigmoose has allowed me to build, i am very fortunate.
well, i did intend writing about my recent trip to nepal, but that can wait, but as this is officially mental health week here is a beautifully touching video bravely recorded by bigmoose’s josie about her story, and please remember if you need help, please reach out, your mental health is our priority.
thank you josie for sharing your story and vulnerability.
until next week, i’ll be seeing ya,
blue skies,
jeff
ps if you or anybody you know needs help with their mental health please reach out here.
